I awoke one morning to find that I had been put into a prison. It was not that I had been placed there, rather one had been built around me. I went on my morning walk to inquire what my crime had been, and encountered a policeman in clean, sharp uniform. I was told that there was no crime, but that necessary precautions were taken and a lengthy speech about the importance of civil liberties. The words were enough to take my mind off of the prison for a while. When I read that out side of our walls raids had taken place in which people were handcuffed for “Intent to cause a riot”, and then released. One of those detained was four years old. I wonder if they had the same chat about civil liberties that we have inside the walls.

This may sound vaguely like Kafka, but it is what my life has been like as I wait for the Republican National Convention. The City of Saint Paul become eerily vacant, as if we are anticipating the arrival of a hurricane. Fortunately, it is only a convention that may be canceled for a hurricane at the other end of the Mississippi. Like the river herself, current events can give us hope or take it away.

What are the Republicans going to do with their convention? I can’t say. There’s just not a good way to conduct business in this environment. That leaves Sarah Palin to be vetted by the press before she gets to make a big speech, should this look like a terrible disaster by Wednesday night. She won’t survive such a vetting.

The pick has been hailed as an attempt to win over women, but that’s not what this was about. McCain needed a Christian conservative that didn’t look like a nut, and Palin fits that role. At least, she fits it at first. The more we hear about her story, the more it seems that she’s either a power-mad nut or a decent person from a world very different than ours. Her best case scenario involves people hearing the theme from “Northern Exposure” in their heads, and that’s not necessarily good. The worst case involves banjos.

McCain and Palin are going to have to make the case that they will bring us something new. Staring out at a hurricane isn’t going to do it for them, and the fact that some pundits are excited about this opportunity shows how ridiculously out of touch they are. Three years ago I went out to have a toast to the death of New Orleans on the night before and everyone thought I was nuts. This time, they’re more prepared but the smug party atmosphere remains. McCain is not going to be able to use this as a chance to show leadership; it will be brutal and ugly.

So what is the message? Signs are that they don’t have one yet. There is only one purpose to these conventions, and it is to deliver the message well enough that the press repeats it. That means you have a message. What I’m hearing so far tells me that they don’t have a thing except a bunch of doublespeak and an attempt to exploit a tragedy.

Call me a cynic, but I don’t think Kafka has a good message to sell. I haven’t been happy as long as my life took a turn his way.  I’m still waiting to hear what the real message is, however,  since I don’t have anywhere to go or anything else to do.  I’m inside the wall, three blocks from the ghost convention with no message.  I’ll let ya know.